What Someone Really Thinks When You Call Them Out for Getting Dessert

It's so messed up that we live in a world where people think it's OK to comment on what we choose to eat. (Are you sure you want another slice of cake?) Rebecca Jane Stokes, an editor at Your Tango, experienced this firsthand while traveling home on the train with a bag of Insomnia Cookies (um, yum!).

Another rider approached her and said, "You're so lucky, just eating whatever you want and not caring. I'm a dancer so I can't do that." Did this woman think she was giving Stokes a compliment? Did she expect Stokes to saying something like: 'Yes, it's so freeing just letting yourself go'?

The comment caught Stokes off guard (who expects to get called out for walking around with cookies?), but then her thoughts started swirling. She perfectly nails all of the things you want to say to someone who body shames you in public in an essay she wrote recounting the incident. Here's an excerpt:

Do I tell her that I first knew I was fat when I was 7?

Do I tell her I saw my first nutritionist, started counting calories, and working out at the gym when I was 12?

Do I tell her that even on my good days I don't look in the mirror and automatically like what I see there?

Do I tell her that every day is a battle to love myself?

Do I tell her that I'm still half convinced the last guy I dated didn't want me in the end because I was too fat?

Do I tell her that the fact I am on a subway carrying a box of cookies is one of the bravest things I've ever done?

Do I tell her that she has just made one of my biggest nightmares come true?

Do I get snotty and say I can tell that she doesn't eat much because of her wrinkled skin?

I am professionally glib. I'm a writer. I'm witty all day, or at least, I try to be. But it was after 10 and I was hot and tired.

So instead I just said "f*ck you" and left it at that.

Then, I shared this story on Facebook. I was touched but not surprised when so many of my friends reached out to express their indignation. I almost didn't share the story at all, because I didn't want to appear like I was fishing for what people view as compliments. "You aren't fat, no!"

I wasn't looking for false reassurance, I was looking for a place to share my anger.



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Valuable Information About UV Radiation

An endless topic about radiation vitality to which we are uncovered on an every day base, we are just mindful of a little part as light or warmth. The energies can likewise be clarified with a wavelength model...

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JoJo’s Dermatologist Refused to Give Her Botox. Here’s What That Taught Her About Self-Love

Celebrities really are just like us—most want to change something about the way they look. (Thanks, unattainable beauty standards!) And if anything, they have more resources to make those changes. So it shouldn't be surprising that 25-year-old singer JoJo (you know you remember her early-2000 anthem "Leave (Get Out)") went to the dermatologist this week to get Botox for the wrinkles around her eyes.

Her dermatologist refused. And in hindsight, JoJo says she's grateful the doctor stopped her. The singer took to Instagram to share her story and talk about the struggles of learning to love yourself:

This is for anyone who picks themselves apart. You are not alone. I went to a dermatologist this morning with plans to get Botox under and on the sides of my eyes. Lately I've been wicked self-conscious about how my cheeks push up and have made lil wrinkles there. (This picture doesn't show how deep one of the lines actually is—the one right above my cheek <this is good lighting>). Concealer sits in the creases and I felt like: Damnit, I am too young to have wrinkles wtf!!!!! So I went to go "fix it." The moral of this story is... my doctor turned me away. And I really really appreciated it. She could've taken my money and honestly I might've looked and felt stupid afterwards. She straight up told me, "This is your anatomy. These are your cheeks. You have these lines because you must smile a lot." And yes, that made me smile…

There are so many images and messages we receive from all angles that can make us feel inadequate in the skin we're in. At 25, it's hard to love and celebrate 100 percent of myself 100 percent of the time. But I'm really trying. That's my truth. And I'm thankful to the real ones who remind me that I'm enough—just as I am.



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5 Cozy Recipes That Make Fall Picnics a Thing

Ayurveda an Unbelievable Method of Treatment

Once a king fell sick, it was very serious, he was unable to eat and drink anything. Lack of hunger and thirst made him more and more serious. He was unable to get up from bed and grew paler day by day. His son and other relatives treated him from all the qualified physicians, but they all failed to understand his diseases. One of the physicians came to the conclusion that the saliva coming through his gland was not generating any more. Saliva is very necessary for the digestive system as it digests the food. Lack of saliva has led to the loss of appetite and thirst.

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Halloween Cocktails for a Scary Good Time

A 30-Minute Resistance Band Workout for Total-Body Strength

Scheduling your workouts is great, but sometimes life gets in the way—and you can kiss that gym session or barre class good-bye. For those moments, we bring you this: a quick, total-body workout you can do in the comfort and convenience of your home.

All you need is a resistance band. The thinner the band is, the less resistance it offers, so choose one that'll make you feel like you're working (yellow usually indicates a medium resistance that works for most people). You'll alternate between small, isolated movements that strengthen every muscle and high-energy bursts of cardio that will keep your heart rate up. That combo is what makes this workout so effective. Just grab a mat and your band to get started.

To recap: You'll need a resistance band. You'll perform a dynamic warm-up for about 2 minutes, followed by a 22-minute workout (see below), with a 4-minute cool-down. The workout is made up of 10 moves performed for about 60 seconds each. The sequence is repeated twice:

  • Lunge Walk
  • Hop With Arm Swing
  • Isolated Leg Swing
  • Twister
  • Resistance Jogger
  • Plank with Leg Raise
  • Standing Leg Circle
  • Squat With Step
  • Plank With Leg Tap
  • Hip Thrust

Looking for more short and effective at-home workouts? Grokker has thousands of routines, so you’ll never get bored. Bonus: For a limited time, Greatist readers get 40 percent off Grokker Premium (just $9 per month) and their first 14 days free. Sign up now!



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Your Quick Guide For Everything About Alkaline Water

Heard about alkaline enhanced water? Here are some of the aspects that you must know, along with some amazing things and facts that may help you in making a choice!

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#YouGoodMan Reveals the Struggles of Dealing With Anxiety and Depression as a Black Man

Earlier this week, Kid Cudi went public about struggling with depression and anxiety in a sobering Facebook post. The hip-hop artist’s brave move inspired many black men to share their own struggles with mental health, which is often seen as a taboo topic in African-American communities.

There's power in realizing that anxiety and depression affect everyone—they're not just "white folk problems." We can't say it any better than these men already did:



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Top 3 Reasons Why You Should Get Tummy Tuck Surgery

In case you're tired of feeling unhappy about your abdomen or need to just fix the zone without doing unending crunches then tummy tuck surgery could be ideal for you. Let's take a look at a couple of more reasons why such a large number of females choose this cosmetic surgery.

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Five Reasons to Plan Ahead for Medical Care

Medical care is an important consideration for all Americans, even those who are young and healthy. Here are five of the biggest reasons to plan ahead.

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The Three Advantages of a Walk in Clinic

A walk in clinic is usually considered a convenient alternative to emergency rooms. Compared to other options, an urgent care center can provide quicker and more affordable care for minor injuries.

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7 Weeknight Vegetarian Dinners You Can Bake in One Pan

How a Terrible Tragedy Saved Me From Being a Terrible Person

Tragedy Stopped Me From Being a Terrible Person I don’t think I ever made the conscious decision to be mean. It was something that had snowballed over the years, fueled by a number of factors that had followed me since childhood: being bullied in school, intense anxiety, and depression. I never imagined I’d be the type of guy who would immediately stop talking to a woman after sleeping with her, let alone the sort of person who’d readily talk about her behind her back.

My descent started after one too many toxic relationships. Was I attracted to people who cheat or vice versa? Whatever the case, after getting burned yet again, I decided no woman was worth my time and that I would get complete control over any relationship by exuding disinterest and contempt. Over the course of a few months, every potential partnership (and I honestly can't remember how many there were) ended terribly and spectacularly.

I would have ended up a spot on the pavement had I taken my rough attitude to the real world.

Relationships weren’t the only place I’d channel my anger; I would pick fights with anyone. If someone made a snide comment on Facebook, I’d make damn sure my response was venomous and mean, warranting a major loss in childhood acquaintances. I would never get physical, knowing I had the power to annoy my opponent to the point of insanity. I probably would have ended up a spot on the pavement had I taken my rough attitude to the real world.

When I was 24, I decided to move in with my brother who, despite being four years younger than me, was wildly more mature. He was the kind of guy who would constantly question the world around him and showcase his way of thinking without forcing an ideology. Adam held me accountable for the things I would say and was the first person to ask me why I thought it was appropriate to call a woman a “slut” or ignore the texts of a love interest I'd grown tired of.

Then something happened that ripped my soul in two and made me reconsider everything I ever believed. My little brother, the only person I ever looked up to, died.

The months after his death were spent either in bed or cradling a glass of whiskey. I lost weight, I stopped going out, and I couldn’t stop thinking about everything I’d done to hurt people. The feelings emanating through my body were excruciating, and all I could imagine were people experiencing a sliver of my emotions.

His death motivated me to put my life under a microscope and extract the poisonous aspect of my personality that had caused so many so much pain. I had treated people—women, mostly—unfairly, and I knew I had to change.

Putting good out in the world would mend the catastrophic hole of sadness my brother's passing ripped into my universe.

Eventually, I came out of the haze enough to move to a new apartment, take a new job, and start over as best I could. The change in me began out of sadness, as I had no energy to be anything but pleasant (albeit distant) with people.

Then, little by little, it started feeling good—like when you stop buying the generic and go for the name brand. I stopped dating around. I focused on repairing relationships and started talking to women I’d broken up with. I tried to visit my older brother and family as often as I could. And I all but disappeared from social media. Admittedly, I could have done more, but I knew I had to start small, and I had to be happy again. In my mind, putting good out into the world would mend the catastrophic hole of sadness my brother's passing ripped into my universe.

Gray Line Break

It sounds silly writing it out, but I really loved making people happy. The little things were always the best: the way someone smiled when you held the door for them, seeing a person’s face perk up when you gave them a compliment, or knowing your over-generous tip would make a waiter’s day. What started as a coping mechanism to help get over the grief of losing my brother turned into a full-on lifestyle.

But it didn't happen overnight. I had to struggle for months to regain control over my personality, as bad habits would creep back in. I went through periods of needlessly ignoring loved ones and lashing out at people for trying to help me.

Then I experienced one of those miraculous light bulb moments I never believed in. I was in Vermont with my parents, trying my hardest to feign excitement for Thanksgiving—Adam’s favorite holiday—when I got a text from a girl. Be honest, Jeremy. Are you avoiding me?

Then that stupid light bulb went off. I thought I was doing so well until I realized I hurt someone I deeply cared about. I wasn’t trying hard enough, and the outcome of my actions wasn't even close to what I wanted. So I started over and tried again. I texted her back immediately and apologized for inadvertently taking out my anger and grief on her, for making her my punching bag. (She accepted my apology, and now we're engaged—but that's a different story.) That text inspired me to take a deeper look at all the relationships I'd previously crippled and to simply be better.

The most surprising part of this process? It stuck... and it's still sticking. The difference between me-now and me-then is like night and day. I can’t believe I went so long being so terrible for the fun of it.

As it stands now, all the good energy I try to put out into the universe is still for my brother, but I see it as a joint effort between him and me to direct that energy toward other people. He was always the one to steer me in the right direction when he was alive, and now I’m putting his lessons into practice as tribute.

What started as a coping mechanism to help get over the grief of losing my brother turned into a full-on lifestyle.

I still have moments here and there when I slip and say something stupid, but I don’t sweat it; there’s no such thing as a person who can say the right thing every single time. I just make sure that I always acknowledge the urge, ask why I’m doing it, and then end it before anything happens. Sometimes I think about the amount of happiness I get out of actively trying to be a good person, and I wonder if I’m doing it all to satisfy my own selfish craving for pleasure. Though I figure, if that's the case, I’d rather be a junkie for happiness than hate.



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Make a Better Pumpkin Spice Latte (and Save Yourself a Trip)

Kid Cudi Gets Real About What It’s Like to Live With Depression

Listening to his music, you'd probably never guess Kid Cudi (a.k.a. Scott Mescudi) lives with crippling anxiety and depression. In a note he wrote to fans after entering rehab, Mescudi explains how mental illness has taken over his life, stopping him from making new friends, trusting others, and leaving the house. This story is all too common, but as was the case with Mescudi, the struggles often go unnoticed by others.

Mescudi's words are so relatable, whether or not you've dealt with mental health issues. He admits he's scared and doesn't know what lies ahead, but as he says, "I deserve to have peace. I deserve to be happy and smiling." That's exactly the kind of message everyone dealing with anxiety and depression needs to hear.



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Penn State's Kicker Opened Up About His Eating Disorder—and It's a Big Deal

When it comes to eating disorders, we tend to think of women (and really, women of a certain size). But one in 15 men in the U.S. will deal with an eating disorder at some point in his life. That's why it's such a big deal that Joey Julius, the kicker on Penn State's football team, opened up about his struggle with binge-eating disorder in a letter to fans on Facebook:

I was admitted into the McCallum Place on May 9th for eating disorders. Due to my increase in... weight but also depression and anxiety, my team physicians started to notice not only a change in my overall happiness but also my performance as a normal human being. Throughout this whole process I learned a lot about myself. I learned that for the last 11 years of my life I have suffered through a disorder known as binge eating disorder.

Thinking of eating disorders as a "women's issue" makes it that much harder for men struggling with the illness to speak up and get the help they need. Julius's post has sparked a huge discussion, with many others (including plenty of men) sharing their own stories:

Joey Julius Photo: Facebook Joey Julius Photo: Facebook Joey Julius Photo: Facebook Joey Julius Photo: Facebook Joey Julius Photo: Facebook Joey Julius Photo: Facebook



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Top Diets To Lose Weight

Some food combinations are both tasty and yummy and instead of making you gain weight, you lose weight... All the best diet plans are based on intake of foods with restrictions on carbohydrates, fats and high calorie products. When you are into these plans, you can take fruits, green leafy vegetables, roughages and foods having less calories. There are many different types of diet plans that are low on carbohydrate, fats and high calories. Some of the top diet plans discussed below are in fact, easy to prepare:

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Weight Has Always Been A Struggle For Me

What you will be is proud of yourself and the steps you are taking to make you better. Not because you have a washboard stomach, or because you've lost weight, but because you made a choice.

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25 Bacon Recipes That Won't Wreck Your Healthy Eating Habits

How to Stop Good Food From Going Bad So Quickly

Wasting money is the worst, and wasting food is a close second. By now, we’ve all probably heard that god-awful stat about Americans wasting some 40 percent of their food. But when that fruit or bread starts to grow hairy mold faster than what seems like the speed of light, it’s a fate that can be difficult to avoid.

Still, I’m trying to do better, both for the sake of my wallet and the environment. So I called up Kathleen Riggs, a food preservation and food safety expert at Utah State University’s Iron County Extension. I wanted to get her take on why some of my everyday staples start to go south so fast, plus the steps I could take to try slowing the spoilage process. Here's what I learned.

Keep Food Fresh Berries Berries

You know how this goes. You bring home a box of jewel-like raspberries or strawberries (with a price tag to match) from the market. By the next day, half of them have already started to turn moldy and mushy.

Why They Go Bad So Fast

Berries are moist, delicate fruits, and when they’re packed tightly in a small clamshell or container, it’s easy for mold to spread from one berry to the next and for spoilage-speeding moisture to get trapped.

How to Slow the Spoilage

Gently examine your berries and get rid of any moldy ones as soon as you bring them home. To kill off any lingering mold, give them a quick soak in a 3:1 solution of water and white vinegar, Riggs says. Dry them thoroughly with a paper towel or a salad spinner, and store them in a container with plenty of air circulation, like a colander. The one exception? Raspberries. Get rid of moldy ones ASAP, but don’t rinse them until right before eating. “They have a hollow center, and moisture can get trapped in there if you rinse them before,” Riggs says.

Keep Food Fresh Bread Bread

Those squishy white loaves that are loaded with preservatives will stay good for quite a while. But the artisan loaf from the farmer’s market you paid twice as much for? Within a few days, it’ll have mold spores, Jackson Pollock-style, all over the surface.

Why It Goes Bad So Fast

Mold loves warm, moist environments—which is exactly what you get when you place bread in a bag and put it in a semi-warm spot, like your kitchen counter, Riggs says. Plus, many loaves contain ingredients, like milk, that just don’t last long at room temperature.

How to Slow the Spoilage

Slice off the part of the loaf you plan to eat within a day or two and let that hang out in its packaging on the counter. (If you notice moisture forming in the bag, open it to let it breathe, Riggs says.) And if you spot a little bit of mold anyway? As long as you’re healthy, slice off the mold, cutting at least an inch around, and eat. “Mold spores, even though you can’t see them, usually extend at least an inch,” Riggs says. (If you have a sensitive stomach or a compromised immune system, you’re better off tossing it.)

As for the rest of the bread? Wrap it well (try foil or plastic wrap), seal in a zip-top bag, and stick it in the freezer. When you’re ready to eat more, let it thaw and toast it up, Riggs says. It won’t be quite as delicious, but it beats stale, moldy bread.

Keep Food Fresh Greens Leafy Greens

Bagged salad greens always have an expiration date that seems far off. And yet half the leaves in the bag or box are already soggy and stinky the minute you open it up.

Why They Go Bad So Fast

Just like with berries, moisture is to blame. It ends up getting trapped in the airtight packaging, turning leaves slimy and brown, Riggs says.

How to Slow the Spoilage

When you get home, open up those bags or boxes ASAP. “Take the greens out of the package, rinse them, and dry them well. Then roll them in paper towels and stick them in a fresh bag,” Riggs says. Leaving the paper towels in place will help sop up additional moisture, keeping your greens drier—and fresher—for longer.

Another tip: If your bagged greens aren’t chopped (like a head of lettuce) and you want to pre-chop them to save time, tear the leaves with your hands instead of chopping them with a knife. “The cut parts react with the knife’s stainless steel blade, and they start to oxidize and turn brown,” Riggs says.

Keep Food Fresh Avocado Avocado

Unless you’re making guac for a crowd, it’s tough to use a whole avocado at once. But whatever you end up storing in the fridge for later usually starts to turn a sickly shade of brown within a few hours.

Why It Goes Bad So Fast

When you slice into an avocado, the surface is exposed to oxygen and starts to turn brown, Riggs says. “The same happens with apples and bananas. It’s just a given.”

How to Slow the Spoilage

Forget leaving the pit intact (does precisely nothing) or rubbing the surface of the avocado flesh with lemon juice (works but barely). Instead, rub the surface of the avocado flesh with a thin layer of olive oil, put the avocado in a sealed bag, and stick it in the fridge. “The olive oil creates a barrier, so the avocado flesh is exposed to less air,” Riggs says. If you still spot some brown when you’re ready to eat the avocado, just scrape it off with a spoon. Unless the avocado is overripe, it’ll still be green underneath, Riggs says.

Keep Food Fresh Ice Cream Ice Cream

It’s a sad day when you open up that half-eaten pint of premium ice cream only to find that the surface is covered in ice crystals.

Why It Goes Bad So Fast

Ice crystal-y ice cream isn’t actually spoiled, Riggs says. It’s just covered in a layer of unappetizing frost that forms because of—you guessed it—too much moisture. “Ice crystals will form in frozen foods that are in a container where there’s air space when the container isn’t completely full,” she says. “Moisture tries to evaporate while it’s freezing, and it gets trapped.”

How to Slow the Spoilage

Try covering the surface of your ice cream with a layer of freezer paper before putting the lid back on. Freezer paper has a plastic underside that acts like a barrier to prevent moisture loss, explains Riggs. (You can find freezer paper at most supermarkets, near the parchment paper and tin foil.) That can help stop water from evaporating out of your ice cream and forming crystals on the surface. Or just invite some friends over to polish off the pint in one go, so you don’t have to worry about sticking it back in the freezer.



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The Moment I Realized I Shouldn’t Have to Hide My Body to Protect Myself

Sexual Harassment Illustration Growing up in East Texas, I went to church with my family every Sunday. Most Wednesday nights I went to youth group. One of the youth leaders was dating a young woman who always wore denim skirts to her ankles. One night I asked her why.

“I don't want to be responsible for causing impure thoughts,” she told me. “I don't want to be a stumbling block to my brothers in Christ.”

When we went on retreats or to summer camp, the girls were required to wear fingertip-length shorts. I was a lanky teen, and my fingertips practically brushed my kneecaps. I ended up wearing a lot of ugly clothes, yet one of the guys still looked at my thighs during the praise songs. I wondered, Had he stumbled? Had I caused him to think impure thoughts?

Gray Line Break

In college, I went on a mission trip where we spent our days painting homes and doing activities with the local children. In the late afternoon and evening, we were permitted to go to the beach. One of the first days we were there, the wife of the trip leader took me aside.

“I need to speak with you privately,” she said. “It's... your breasts. They're too large. There's too much cleavage. I'm going to have to sew a piece of fabric into your swimsuit if you're going to keep wearing it on this trip.” (I was wearing a one-piece swimsuit with knee-length board shorts.) Shame filled my body, and my face grew hot. I went to my room and cried, then changed and handed over my suit.

Gray Line Break

My second-to-last semester of college happened to be during summer, and I wore my standard uniform of tank tops and capri pants to campus. I was an intern for a literary journal, spending my days in a lonely basement office, transferring a typewritten book manuscript to a Word document. Most of my time was spent in front of a computer with my back to the door.

Maybe if I ignore him, he'll go away. He didn't go away.

Still, I could sense when the English professor was standing in the doorway. Somehow he was always around when I was there. One day, he crept into the office and stood over me, looking down my tank top.

“I can say this because I'm old enough to be your grandfather,” he smiled. “You got the goods.”

Due to the culture in which I had grown up, I thought, This must be my fault. I should start wearing a sweater. Maybe if I ignore him, he'll go away. He didn't go away. He would come by almost every day to make dirty comments or silently watch me file documents. I was graduating that year and didn't want to cause trouble. It wasn't until I realized I was crying every day on the way to campus and breaking out in a sweat whenever I walked downstairs to my office that I realized I needed to say something.

Gray Line Break Lauren Beach Photo After many years of letting others make the rules, I've now taken full ownership of my body.

I know I'm not alone in these experiences. These accounts are not exhaustive. There are many others, and I'm sure many of you reading this have similar stories of your own.

It wasn't until a few years ago that I began to realize how harmful the messages I had learned in my childhood and adolescence were and continue to be. I have allowed men to act in certain ways toward me, and even put myself in dangerous situations with them, because I did not want to seem rude. I have blamed myself for the behaviors of men, thinking it must have been something I said/wore/implied that caused them to respond to me the way they did.

Several weeks ago, I was performing psych assessments in an emergency room when my phone buzzed. It was a message from the service I use to market my private practice to potential mental health clients.

“Can you help me with P.E.?” the man had asked.

“What's that?” I replied.

“Premature ejaculation,” he responded. He proceeded to email me photos of myself—from Instagram, Google, Twitter, and my website—for the next two hours. “Can I show you 16 super sexy pics? Such a turn on” were the messages attached to photos of my face. Photos I had shared online.

All the things I thought I knew about sexuality and feminism flew out the window. I was terrified. My first thought was: I brought this on myself. I shouldn't have posted those selfies. I should make every account I have private. Thankfully, at the suggestion of my therapist, I took another route.

Sexual harassment. Those two words held all the validation I had needed.

I called the police department, not sure how they would respond. The police officer was somber. “We take this kind of thing very seriously,” he said. “This is sexual harassment.”

Sexual harassment. Those two words held all the validation I had needed—then and in previous situations. This makes me uncomfortable. This isn't okay. This is a reflection on him, not me.

I felt stronger, clearer, braver. I typed a response: This is inappropriate behavior that crosses professional boundaries. I have filed a police report and do not wish to be contacted by you again. I exhaled loudly and pressed send.

Gray Line Break

Now more than ever, I wear what I want to wear, knowing that I dress for myself. If a man responds to my clothing inappropriately, that's his personal responsibility, not mine. I'm proud of my body—all 5-feet, 11 inches of it. I shouldn't feel the need to try to shrink or make myself less visible to protect myself, and most days I don't. I still post selfies online. If a man says or does something that makes me feel uncomfortable, I will remove myself from the situation and/or confront him directly. After years of silence, I'm speaking up.

I shouldn't feel the need to try to shrink or make myself less visible to protect myself.

Just because something is not sexual assault or rape doesn't mean it's not sexual harassment. If someone is in a position of authority—an employer, a church leader, a professor—that's even more of a reason not to stay silent. The more we speak up against the daily acts of disrespect against us, the more confidence we build, and the more comfortable we become calling people out for sexual harassment and inappropriate behavior as it occurs.



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Infamous “Fit Mom” Experiences Reality, Admits We Should Cut Ourselves Some Slack

You might remember Maria Kang as the fit mom who caused an uproar after posting a photo showing off her toned body (and three kids) under the question: What's your excuse? Here's a quick refresher:

Maria Kang original Photo: Maria Kang Three years later, Kang is done with body shaming other moms. Now she wants to empower women. She lifted the veil and shared a series of unedited photos to her Instagram.

Kang doesn't hide her (slight) stretch marks, and she owns up to the intense diet and fitness regimen she followed before taking the now infamous photo. In an interview with People, Kang explains how she thinks about her body differently:

I’ve gained 10 pounds since my "What’s Your Excuse" photo, and I’m not hiding from that fact. I want to empower others to step in front of the camera and be unapologetic, thankful, and proud of where they are today. Beauty is in our minds and is reflected in the eyes of the people who truly love you. It doesn’t matter if you are skinny, fit, overweight or obese, if you don’t live in gratitude, you will never see what you truly have and who you truly are.

We're glad that Kang is spreading the message of embracing your body, no matter what. But she's not exactly a body-positive role model: "Regardless if we have some cellulite, extra weight, extra skin or extra scars—be proud because we are constantly progressing, transforming, and aging!" Extra? We're pretty sure they're all just parts of your body.



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We Need to Talk About the Amendment That Prevents Poor Women From Getting Abortions

Just because abortion is legal in the U.S. doesn't mean all women have access to it. We've heard stories of women traveling hundreds of miles, sometimes across state lines, to reach the nearest clinic. Then there's the Hyde Amendment. Never heard of it? That's the problem.

Forty years ago last week Congress tacked the amendment onto an appropriations bill. It prevents Medicaid from paying for abortions, except in cases of rape or incest, or situations where the pregnancy puts the life of the mother at risk.

Medicaid provides healthcare for low-income Americans, and it serves a disproportionate number of minorities. These women are eligible for government-supported healthcare specifically because they can't afford it and don't have access to health insurance through an employer. So it shouldn't be surprising that one in four women on Medicaid seeking an abortion ends up carrying her pregnancy to term.

The crazy thing is Medicaid provides women access to other sexual health services, including sterilization and birth control. In many states, it will cover the cost of Viagra for men. But when it comes to abortion, women don't have a choice (unless they can pay for it out of pocket).

The upcoming election could change that: Hillary Clinton has said she'll fight to repeal the Hyde Amendment, while Donald Trump is a firm supporter of the policy.



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Hormonal Birth Control Is Linked to Greater Risk of Depression—So How Much Should You Worry?

First, the bad news: Hormonal contraceptives (basically every form of birth control except condoms and copper IUDs) increase a woman's risk of depression by 40 percent after just six months of use, according to a new comprehensive study. But before you swear off the pill (or sex altogether), let's weigh the pros and cons.

Birth control prevents unwanted pregnancies by giving women added doses of estrogen and progesterone to ensure their ovaries don't release an egg. Those added hormones can also help regulate periods and improve acne. But sometimes they lead to mood swings and, as the recent study showed, an increased risk for depression. That's a serious side effect, but it's also one that can be monitored closely by a physician. Be proactive. Talk to your doctor about your concerns with birth control, so the two of you can put a plan in place. That way you can get the protection you want while not compromising your mental health.



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I Wish I'd Let Myself Enjoy These 4 Things More—but It's Not Too Late for You

No Regrets With Susie Moore This week I caught up with a couple of former colleagues over dinner. We fondly reminisced about the "good old days" when we used to be cubicle buddies. But as we talked about all the fun lunches and work trips we used to enjoy, something struck me. Back then, they didn't feel like the "good old days" at all. I remember us constantly complaining of stress, frustration, and dissatisfaction at work.

So which sentiment is correct: Were those days good or not? Do we see the past with rose-colored glasses? Or were we living some of our best days then and just didn’t know it?

In all honesty, I think it’s the latter. And that got me thinking about the other things I wish I had allowed myself to enjoy more over the years. I bet I’m not the only one. Here's what I believe we could all benefit from doing a little differently when given the opportunity.

Women Laughing Having Coffee

Embrace the single life.

After I separated from my first husband, I was on a dating mission. I went out every weekend with my single girlfriends on the hunt for potential love interests. And I landed my next boyfriend (now my second husband) just nine months later. Thankful as I am for finding him, I wish I had allowed myself to enjoy single life more instead of worrying about where my next long-term relationship was coming from.

How to do it better: If I were in that position again, I would allow my anxiety to be replaced with appreciation. So he or she hasn’t texted you back? Breathe. Either they will and you are overreacting (hey, it’s only been one day!), or they won’t because they aren’t that into you. That’s OK. Better to know sooner. There are plenty more where he or she came from.

Maybe you haven't been on a date in a month. Remember: Dating can come in waves. That’s OK too. If you're ready (no pressure!), try harder next month. Think: What can I do to get out there more?

Learn to love your body.

My friend Danielle and I were looking at old photos of ourselves recently when she gasped, “Oh my God, I looked like that in my 20s? I can’t believe I thought I was fat!” Funny, isn’t it? As I looked at photos of myself I also thought, Why was I so self-critical? I was cute!

How to do it better: I remember those harsh criticisms when looking in the mirror today and force myself to let current criticisms go. If not, I know I’ll regret not appreciating the woman I am right now. I’ve decided to like what I’ve got.

Imagine if we obsessed over all of the things we love about ourselves.

I put it on Instagram recently, and I mean it: Imagine if we obsessed over all of the things we love about ourselves. Pick one thing you love about yourself every morning and state it aloud before the mirror. Say: “Awesome hair day!” or “My booty’s lookin' fine. Hell yeah for jeans season!” Do it. Seriously. Notice the immediate shift in how you feel and enjoy it.

Get comfy with change and uncertainty.

After leaving a great job in Sydney, Australia, I moved to New York at age 25 with no professional network or promising career prospects. It took me three months to get hired after a whole lotta hustle. And those three months were torture! I was constantly worried about money and concerned I would never be employed again.

During that time, I took yoga every day to give me a reason to leave my apartment and so I could make friends in a new city. Ironically, even daily vinyasa classes couldn't help me de-stress. I was impatient during the meditations. All I could think about was checking my phone after class for job interview updates. Looking back, I regret not milking every minute and truly exhaling. I actually daydream about having an opportunity like that again.

How to do it better: I hear this a lot from people who are laid off: They worry about never finding work instead of relaxing just a little bit and enjoying the gap between their last job and the next.

Focus on planning over worrying. Take a couple of days to center yourself instead of immediately emailing your resume around town like a maniac. Use your nervous energy to propel you into constructive online research and some in-person networking. Once you're doing what you can to get hired (and let's be honest, job seeking rarely consumes eight or nine hours per day), make healthy habits and pleasures a priority.

It’s rare to have a solid chunk of time to exercise or get the sleep your body needs. You'll be happy you took the time once that 7 a.m. alarm goes off on the first Monday of your new gig.

Be cool with beginnings.

Learning a new language. Entering a new career. Moving to a new city. Whenever I’ve had to do new things in my life, I’ve been in such a hurry to master them, I’ve rarely enjoyed the process of arriving there. I’d be easily frustrated with language mistakes, all too eager to settle into a new company before enjoying my job, or desperate to familiarize myself with a new city versus just enjoying the newness of it all.

How to do it better: Be OK with not being an expert right off the bat—nix those crazy expectations you have of yourself! Being new at something does not make you inadequate. It makes you humble. It forces you to feel awake and alert—like an enthusiastic beginner again.

Gray Line Break Ironically, when we have confidence that the relationship will come, that our body is enough, that the job will show up, and that we will master what we need to, that sense of ease speeds up the results we're hoping for. Now allow yourself to enjoy the good old days while you're still in them.

Susie Moore is Greatist’s life coach columnist and a confidence coach in New York City. Her new book, What If It Does Work Out?, is available on Amazon now. Sign up for free weekly wellness tips on her website and check back every Tuesday for her latest No Regrets column!



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Beauty in Imperfection

Only few people know the beauty in imperfection. In fact character, courage, discipline, fortitude and integrity are considered as strong predictors of beauty.

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Snapping a Photo of Your Meal and Instantly Getting the Calorie Count Is a Horrible Idea

If you didn't Instagram your dinner, did it even happen? Now the dieting app Lose It! has another use for all of those food pics: Instantly get a read on the number of calories in your meal. It's worth noting the app isn't always accurate, and it doesn't recognize sauces or oils, so you have to enter that info manually.

But there are two bigger issues here:

  1. Calorie counting is flawed. We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again: Losing weight is more complicated than burning more calories than you take in. Plus, obsessing over numbers isn't a long-term solution for healthy living. It's better to think about the types of food you're eating and look for the places you can make small improvements.
  2. Not all calories are equal. Eating 300 calories of chicken or 300 calories of candy doesn't mean the same thing to your body. Even two foods that are high in a similar macronutrient (carbohydrates, for example) can affect your body differently. Brown rice and Pop-Tarts are both high in carbs, but one has more nutrients your body needs—and we bet you can guess which one.

The bottom line? Knowledge is power when it comes to eating healthier, but snapping a photo to see the number of calories in your meal is very different from learning about the foods your body needs. And the latter option is much more sustainable.



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Hormones May Be The Answer To Your Weight Loss Concern

Many are successful in losing weight by changing their lifestyle. Having reached that goal and continuing that way they will keep that weight they have chosen. But there are some who have tried everything recommended and could not bring that weight down, why?

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These High-Tech Shades Are Like a Personal Trainer—No, Seriously

I’m a technophobe when it comes to exercise. I've resisted the fitness tracker trend, don’t run a computer on my bike, and only occasionally use an app when I run. I guess you could say I’m a purist. I prefer to focus on how I feel rather than drown in data. Even if I enjoyed analyzing stats, then what? You need to know what to do with that information to make it valuable, and no shiny new tech accessory or app has ever offered me that solution—until the Oakley Radar Pace.

Oakley Radar Pace My initial thought was, “Really? A pair of sunglasses?” But that’s part of why this product is so genius: It’s an accessory I already use every time I run or ride outdoors, so adding it to my routine was effortless.

Here’s how it works: Download the Radar Pace app (available for iOS and Android) on your smartphone and pair the sunglasses. Go for your first casual workout or set up a structured training plan based on a goal (like running a 10K). The sunglasses are voice activated so you can prompt them as you run or ride ("How’s my pace?" "What's my heart rate?") without fussing with a wristband or phone. Just say, "OK, Radar..." to get the gadget's attention. You'll also get unprompted feedback as you go.

The coolest part? The frames hold a complex computer (powered by Intel) at a fraction of the weight (just 56 grams!)—without compromising on Oakley’s keen eye for design. The lens shape is Oakley's No. 1 best seller and instantly makes you look like a badass. Oh, and did I mention the sunglasses are multilingual? Radar speaks five different languages: English, French, German, Italian, and Spanish. Show-off.

The more workouts you log, the more data Radar has to customize your workouts. If you miss one, it will compensate by adjusting your next few. Start to overtrain and it'll remind you to take it easy. The app will continue to cater to your personal fitness levels and training style to help you accomplish your goals—whether that's training for a marathon or just riding your bike more. The sunglasses also connect to your smartphone so you can take calls, listen to text messages, control music, or activate Siri or Google Now.

Check out this short video to see them in action:

The Bottom Line

I thrive on the social aspect of exercise. I love to run or ride my bike with a friend, but in order to fit exercise into my crazy schedule, I often have to do it alone. Radar provides some company during solo sessions, as well as useful, real-time feedback—which I found incredibly motivating, even though I'm not competitively training for anything.

Sure, there are downsides. The $499 price point, for one. But when you compare it to the cost of gym memberships and personal trainers or coaches, it’s actually a pretty affordable investment, especially as the app evolves with software updates. Though it currently only tracks running and cycling, I wouldn't be surprised if more activities are added in the future. And though some might argue sunglasses cater to outdoor workouts, the kit includes a clear lens for indoor ones, like a treadmill run.

They might not be right for everyone, but if you’re like me and love exercising outdoors—but don’t want to fuss with complicated wristbands—these shades will help you train smarter, not harder.



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The Average American Is a Size 16. Here's What That Actually Looks Like

The average American woman wears a size 16—and before you jump to any conclusions, let's pause to see what that actually looks like:

Yep, they all proudly use the hashtag #size16. We're conditioned to think wearing plus-size clothes is something to be ashamed of. But these women look amazing. And they all have different body types, proving yet again that clothing sizes are just a number.

This is the new normal, and each woman is rocking a size 16 in her own way:



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4 Ways To Test Your Body Fat

Body fat is the amount of fat in your body when you compare it to bones, muscles, water, tendons, organs and other body components. To remain healthy and minimize the chances for cardiovascular and other diseases, you should lower your body fat levels to at least the acceptable percentages of 25-31% in women and 18-25% in men. To know when you are healthy it's recommended that you measure your body fat levels. To help you out, here are some of the ways of doing it:

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NBC’s New Hit Show Fat Shames, but Its Plus-Size Actress Makes an Important Point About Weight Loss

NBC's new hit show This Is Us has been praised for crafting complex characters that the audience instantly empathizes with. But many viewers are frustrated by one character, Kate, who only seems to be defined by her size and her desperation to lose weight.

To be fair, we're only two episodes in, so there's a good chance Kate will become a more well-rounded character by the end of the first season. For now, everything is focused on her weight struggles, which only feels like a baby step of progress from the overdone trope of the funny fat friend we see on most network shows.

But Chrissy Metz, the actress who plays Kate, makes a good point in a recent interview with Refinery29: At a time when the body-positive movement emphasizes loving the way you look, it's still totally normal to want to lose a few pounds:

I truly believe that if you don’t accept yourself or where you're at, you can't get to the place where you want to be, or become the person you feel you're supposed to be. I go back and forth. I’m like, "Yeah, I'm cool, it's fine!'"And then, "Ugh."

I'm not ever gonna be a tiny girl, but I have an idea of a size that I would like to be. I've always had this idea in my mind, but at the same time, I'm not beating up myself. I'm not saying, "I wish I was this, I wish I was that," because it's counterproductive. Some women and some men feel comfortable being plus-size, or some people feel more athletic, etc. Whatever makes you feel good, that’s what I think you should pursue. I'm kind of in both worlds. Part of me wants to change, and part of me is like, "No, I'm good."

And while we hope that's not the only way we connect with her character, it's an important message to share.



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Benefits of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy

Cognitive behavioural therapy is a method of treatment that works to change the way that the patient thinks, therefore working to change the patients actions over time, and can help reduce the need for medication. This form of therapy can be useful both by itself and in combination with medication, and comes with a great deal of benefits for clients.

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Simple Tips to Find the Best Dermatologist

Finding a good dermatologist is not less than an uphill task. The reason being our skin is a precious gift from nature, and we do not want to compromise it. What makes a dermatologist different from others? What are the attributes of the best dermatologist? Read more to know

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Is There Light at the End of the Tunnel?

When misfortune appears to be relentless for a period of time you question will it ever end? I have bounced along happily for years so it seemed nothing could go wrong. That was until last February when I fell and fractured my knee when walking on the parched rocky path in Spain.

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How to Apply a French Manicure at Home

Flower nail design is one of the most attractive nail designs in the world of the nail. There have many nail kits such as french manicure kit, dip powder kit are available in the market and you can easily make an attractive design at home by using them but still flower nail design make a different appearance for your nails.

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The "I Don't Knows" of Weight Loss

When it comes to weight loss, between STIMULUS and REACTION Is CHOICE. We get the results of decisions we make & actions we take, or don't.

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29 Unexpected (but Awesome) Ways to Use Canned Pumpkin