The Best Way to Lose Weight in 2017

The dream of many persons to achieve that perfect shape that will make them look fit always is possible through healthy eating. The kind of food you eat determine the kind of shape you are likely to get. There is a saying that you are a product of what you eat. Eating the right way and exercising regularly helps you to accomplish your dream shape.

from Health and Fitness Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2iXdpGC

Things You Should Do When Getting Pharmaceutical Supplies

The health industry is one of the most sensitive. It is supposed to extend solutions to improve health and the slightest overlook could be the thin line between life and death. Pharmaceutical supplies are important and they should be handled with the seriousness they deserve. If you are a supplier you will only manage to create a good reputation in the market only with quality products that are approved by the right bodies.

from Health and Fitness Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jKfedR

We Don't Need This Guy to Say Plus-Size Is Sexy, but It Sure Doesn't Hurt

Corny as it may sound, the best kind of body positivity comes from within. That’s not to say we don’t appreciate a little help along the way, especially if it's coming from someone like Jay Kennedy.

Here’s a man—who fits all of society's measures of what it means to be fit—breaking through the taboos that make some men feel like it's weird or unusual to be attracted to plus-size women. And if Kennedy’s message happens to reach someone who’s plus-size and struggles to see themselves as desirable, that isn’t really a bad thing, either.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jWC8N7

Why Taking DNA Tests Can Change How You See Your Family

On the surface, my family appeared to have a genetically uncomplicated story—we believed that we were of Italian and Irish descent. Our relationships with each other, of course, were more complex. My family is small and disconnected: My parents are divorced, my mother had no siblings, her parents died when I was young, and most of my father’s people are widely dispersed, and don’t speak to each other much. Having spent my teen years in foster care, I often felt alone and without anchor—to my family, to my culture, and to a sense of self.

I envied friends whose holidays were filled with cousins and aunts and grandparents, making old recipes handed down from generations past. As I got older, and as more people passed away and visits became rarer, I found that I wanted more and more to unravel the facts behind my own family story. Everyone wants to feel a sense of home, don’t they?

At the outset, I believed that all four of my grandparents had emigrated to the U.S. Although we thought that my mother’s side was mostly Irish, we had a few questions, like the origin of her maiden name, which is very rare (and also… not Irish), and was possibly changed once we came over to America. We didn’t have any records of how these grandparents emigrated, and as I looked into it, I realized that they were actually pretty mysterious to us, these people we had come from. Where had they grown up? And why did they come here? Why hadn’t anyone passed their stories down to my mother? All I have of them are some old, grainy photos.

My beautiful, mysterious family.

My father’s family had clearer stories: They came from the Italian mainland and islands, and as they emigrated in the 1920s, they tried to assimilate and shed their cultural identity in many ways, although they continued to deeply embrace Roman Catholicism. But that was all I really knew.

And so I began solving the mystery by tracking my heritage through ancestry records and DNA tests. I took three separate tests and ran my raw DNA data—which comes with any DNA test—through the GEDMatch ethnicity calculators, then averaged out the results for each. Each testing service has their own sample pools against which they test an individual’s DNA, so there were minor differences in the results, but for the most part, my results were very cohesive.

Unlike one writer—whose test confirmed exactly who she thought she was—my results actually, truly surprised me in ways that I am happy to embrace. After taking these tests, I’m able to confirm that I am roughly equal parts Mediterranean (only 20% of that being Italian!), Northwestern European, Iberian, Middle Eastern, West Asian—with a bit of Balkan and Ashkenazi Jewish mixed in.

I met my second cousin for the first time, who sent me pictures and stories of my great-grandparents.

Another point of interest, which I discovered through the 23andMe Chromosome Painting feature, is that my ancestors were very recently from their locations—the feature can estimate how many generations ago ancestors from certain locations came into your genetic picture.

So how does this whole genetic testing thing work? You buy a test, spit in a tube, and send your results off to be analyzed. The whole thing takes about a month. I’m sure the process of what they do back at the lab is pretty complicated because science, but according to AncestryDNA, their test works something like this:

"We measure and analyze a person’s entire genome…. Then we compare your DNA to… DNA samples from people around the world, to identify overlap. As our database of DNA samples continues to grow, you could receive updates with new information."

Of course, no DNA test is 100 percent accurate—especially with regards to micro-populations, migration, and the fact that countries, are, in effect, just constructs. It’s also important to note that most genetic research—especially where health is concerned—has been focused on Europe, which leaves a lot out of the picture.

Bearing in mind that representative samples can be skewed by migration and tons of other variables (including a lack of representative pool samples for some regions), DNA testing can usually get you close enough to a generalized view of who you are. Some tests may be able to tell you which regions you’re from, while others can narrow it down by country.

You might also like READ

All this new information has been a tremendous help as I attempt to trace my family’s paper trail; knowing what to look for has made narrowing down the search much easier. I started searching for my great-grandparents in countries that I would never have thought they’d come from, and was able to find them—as it turns out, they were from the Balkans.

I’ve also found countless cousins and distant family members in the DNA database who were able to close gaps in my heritage search. I met my second cousin for the first time, who sent me pictures and stories of my great-grandparents—as well as more surnames to search. I discovered that my other family members were creative, like me: We could boast plenty of painters and musicians. And now I have a whole new network of people I’d otherwise never have met.

But this new information also sparked unanswerable questions. In an effort to assimilate to American culture, did my family erase their roots—and all the food, song, politics, stories, and religions that defined their culture? And did my mother’s family—who came to the United States—actually have Jewish roots? Their arrival would have synced with a time when many Eastern European Jews fled Poland and Russia during the pogroms of the 1880s. Is that why some of the stories had remained a mystery?

My ancestors, wearing some lovely hats and boutonnières.

In addition to genealogical information—and the resulting questions—DNA testing can also be used to understand your health risks and help you see if you’re a carrier for certain conditions. Knowing that you carry a gene can help you plan for your future. It was so interesting to see that my genes revealed the exact autoimmune disorder I suffer from. I also found out potential issues that could arise in the future, one being that I may have problems metabolizing certain drugs, like Warfarin, a blood thinner. Though I hope this will never be a problem, that knowledge could be really useful when speaking to my doctor about possible medications. Although I can understand why some people wouldn’t want to know this information, I found it empowering.

For some, genetic testing may reconcile a sense of self lost to transatlantic slavery, clear up false family narratives, or literally reveal migration patterns. For me, DNA testing has helped me fill in the lines. With so much missing and so much forgotten in my own family story, I’ve loved being able to embrace my newly discovered roots and explain certain aspects of myself, and I am grateful to truly know and tell the story of my life.

Lisa Marie Basile is the founding editor-in-chief of Luna Luna Magazine and moderator of its digital community. Her work has appeared in The Establishment, Bustle, Bust, Hello Giggles, Marie Claire, Good Housekeeping, and The Huffington Post, among other sites. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2iUgaZ3

Meal-Prep an Entire Week's Worth of Dinner With Just 8 Ingredients

There's nothing worse than coming home after a long day of work with absolutely zero clue as to what you're having for dinner. That's when pizza happens for the fourth night in a row. Not that we're saying anything is wrong with that: We love pizza too, but since we already ate it three times over the weekend, it's about time we get in a few healthier meals. Thanks to this super-simple meal-prep plan, you won't have to think about dinner again. Except for like 30 minutes on Sunday. Let's do it.

Step 1:

Hit up the grocery store.

Got a pen and paper and 15 minutes? Write down these eight ingredients. Yep, only eight. We challenge you to time yourself in the store, because this is the shortest grocery list ever.

Shopping List

• 1 bunch kale
• 2 sweet potatoes
• 4 cups baby arugula
• 3/4 cup quinoa
• 1 cup canned black beans
• 8 ounces fresh salmon fillet (or fish of choice)
• 8 ounces boneless skinless chicken breast
• 1 avocado

Don't forget your storage containers:

• 5 glass containers (1 for cooked sweet potatoes, 1 for salmon, 1 for chicken, 1 for quinoa, and 1 for black beans)
• 2 large plastic bags for kale
• Plastic wrap for avocado

And a few kitchen staples (you probably already have on hand):

• Olive oil
• Balsamic vinegar
• Sea salt
• Lemon juice

Step 2:

Prep everything in 30 minutes.

After you go to brunch and speed through the grocery store (but before the binge-watching begins), set aside 30-40 minutes on Sunday to prep the simple ingredients.*

1. Cook chicken.
This is the best way to cook chicken so it's not one big piece of dried-up cardboard. *Wait until Tuesday night to cook your chicken. Foodsafety.gov says cooked chicken stays good for up to four days, so it's better to play it safe.
2. Cook salmon:
Whether you want to bake it or pan-fry, we've got you covered.
3. Cook quinoa:
Quinoa is simple. It's a 1 to 2 ratio; if you're cooking 3/4 cup quinoa, you'll need 1 1/2 cups water. Boil it until water dissolves, about 20 minutes, and it's ready for ya.
4. Roast sweet potatoes:
Roasting is so easy. Cube one of the taters and cut fry-shapes with the other. Add them to the same pan but separated, toss with olive oil, and bake for 20-25 minutes.
5. Rinse black beans:
Drain and rinse the black beans from the can and store them in a glass container so they're ready whenever you need them.
6. Prep kale:
Wash and remove stems from kale leaves. Break into smaller pieces (ya know, the size you'd want if you were eating a salad) then store in a large plastic bag with a paper towel to soak up any leftover moisture.
7. Arugula and avocado can stay as is:
No prepping necessary since those boxes of greens typically get triple-washed, and all you have to do with the avo is slice into it.

Step 3:

Enjoy ready-to-eat dinners Sunday through Thursday.

We like eating home-cooked meals Sunday-Thursday and saving Fridays for a night out on the town. We deserve it after being good all week.

Start-Your-Week-Off-Right Sunday Night

• 4 ounces salmon
• 1/2 of the roasted sweet potatoes
• 1 cup arugula
• 1/4 avocado

How to plate: Toss arugula and avocado with olive oil and lemon juice. If you want to heat up the taters and salmon, pop in the microwave for 1-2 minutes.

Meatless Monday

• 1/2 cup canned black beans
• 1/4 cup quinoa
• 1 cup arugula
• 1/4 avocado

How to plate: Combine all ingredients into a bowl and toss with olive oil and lemon juice.

Taco (Salad) Tuesday

• 4 ounces chicken, shredded
• 1/2 of the cubed, roasted sweet potato
• 1/4 cup canned black beans
• 1/4 avocado
• 2 cups kale

How to plate: Heat up the chicken and sweet potatoes in the microwave for 1-2 minutes. Toss kale with olive oil and sea salt and massage so kale starts to soften. Add to a bowl and then top with avocado, beans, and shredded chicken. Shake as much hot sauce on it as you'd like and enjoy sweet potatoes on the side.

Workout Wednesday

• 4 ounces salmon
• 1 cup sautéed kale
• 1/4 cup quinoa
• 1 cup arugula

How to plate: This one requires 4 minutes of cooking if you prefer cooked kale over raw: Sauté the kale in olive oil with sea salt for 4 minutes, until wilted. Microwave the salmon for 1-2 minutes. Combine quinoa with arugula and a drizzle of lemon juice, then pair with salmon and kale.

Thirsty Thursday (a Good Meal to Soak Up Happy Hour)

• 4 ounces chicken
• 1 cup arugula
• Sweet potato fries
• 1/4 avocado
• ​1/4 cup quinoa mixed
• 1/4 cup black beans

How to plate: Before you go out for happy hour, get in a big meal by adding warmed-up chicken over a bed of arugula, a side of sweet potato fries, and a combo of quinoa, black beans, and avocado smothered in hot sauce (if you want). We bet you'll even have leftover fries for those late-night munchies when you get home.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2kb6LSf

The Ultimate Guide to Surviving Life on Crutches (Happily)

Crutches can be quite the nuisance. If you’ve never been on crutches before, then not only do you have to deal with whatever injury caused you to be on crutches in the first place, but now you’ve become a walking tripod with no good sense of how to maneuver through the world.

While these new circumstances can be unpleasant, there are several strategies to make recovery as fun as possible. These tips have been put to the test—I’ve gone through two rounds of being on crutches. After having a miserable experience the first time around, I was committed to making the second one as seamless and enjoyable as possible. In the process, I’ve learned several tips that I hope will improve your crutching experience, too.

Ask Important Questions

When the doctor first delivers the news that you’ll be on crutches, it’s easy to get caught up in thinking about the volleyball game you can't play, the Zumba class you can't dance in, or the 5K you can't run. But it’s important to stay focused on a few practical questions that will be crucial to planning your time on crutches. Ask the doctor the following questions:

• Will you be able to rest your injured limb on the ground? If so, can you use it for balance while walking?
• How can you bathe? Can you stand in the shower, or do you need to use a bath tub?
• Can you just use one crutch as a cane? If so, what’s the best way to walk with a cane?
• Can you go swimming?
• What are the best ways to position your arms and maintain posture while using crutches?

Once you have the rules of the game figured out, it's time to prepare yourself for moving about the world on crutches.

Tips and Tricks for Navigating the World on Crutches

Wear a Backpack

If you don't have one, buy one. A backpack will become your best friend. If possible, choose a waterproof bag, since you may not be able to maneuver out of a downpour quickly. Avoid wearing purses, because they can mess up your balance.

Jazz Out Your Crutches

Maximize comfort and functionality by taking three key factors into consideration:

• Cushioning. If you don't obtain adequate cushioning for your crutches, you’re likely to get bruised and lose your motivation to participate in certain activities out of fear that they’ll hurt. Good cushioning is worth the investment. I’ve personally used the ones from Crutcheze ($29.99).
• Pockets. These attach to the crutch itself, securing your items and ensuring they don’t throw off your balance. There are a few different shapes, sizes, and materials to pick from. I personally chose these two: a smaller one by Crutcheze ($19.99) and a bigger one by Krutch Kaddy ($34.95). I use the smaller one for my wallet and MetroCard and the bigger one for everything else. Just be sure to balance the weight to keep yourself stable.
• Crutch Tips. Most crutches are not made for wet surfaces. This means rain or kitchen clumsiness can be a disaster if your tips slip. At the very least, I recommend that anyone on crutches invest in rain tips. If you'll be on crutches through the winter, look into snow tips as well. It’s also worthwhile to consider other features, such as shock absorption. Fancy tips may seem expensive, but they're cheaper than a secondary injury caused by a crutch slip. I bought these tips from Fetterman ($48.00).

Plan Your Meals

Being on crutches makes both shopping and eating very complicated. Luckily, there are some tips you can follow to make these activities as seamless as possible.

You might also like READ

Shopping

It’s extremely difficult, if near impossible, to go grocery shopping while on crutches. Carrying food throws off your balance, while putting food into your backpack as you shop makes it look like you’re stealing. That’s why I recommend that folks avoid the store while on crutches. If your area has food delivery and you can afford it, go for it. Otherwise, you will need to plan.

First, list out everything you’ll need to consume on a weekly and monthly basis. Next, enlist help. If you have a partner, family member, or good friend who is willing to help you, let them. They won't realize how much help you need unless you make sure to ask. If asking is too daunting (or you don’t have anyone to rely on over a long stretch), use TaskRabbit or Craigslist to enlist someone to help you for cash.

Eating

Bad news: It’s no longer possible to carry plates and cups to the table. There are three effective ways to get around this obstacle.

• Portable, sealable containers. Make sure to purchase portable containers that seal well so they can be used to carry both food and liquids. This way, you'll be able to cook or heat food and carry it to your eating space in your backpack. Liquid containers will even allow you to make tea or carry coffee.
• A rolling table. If there are no steps between the kitchen and wherever you eat, any flat surface with wheels (e.g., small tables or chairs) can be used to transport your food from kitchen to table.
• Help. Ask someone to transport your food for you.

Choose Sensible Shoes

Make sure to wear only comfortable shoes. The last thing you need is to injure your good leg because of insensible shoes. Remember, your good leg has a lot more responsibility and weight bearing down on it right now—give it as much support as you can.

Adjust for Height Changes

Remember to adjust your crutches to your new height when barefoot. If you don't, your stride and posture will be affected, which can cause you to trip.

Prepare for Stairs

Stairs and crutches are mortal enemies. Do not face them unless you absolutely have to. It is possible to go up and down stairs on crutches, but the problem is that your balance becomes very fragile. Any misstep or bump from a stranger could mean disaster. It's simply not worth the risk.

Expect to Get Wet

Sorry to tell you: Rain will make you wet. There is no way for you to carry an umbrella unless you're willing to wear one of these. There are two things you can do: One, wear a rain coat. Two, try to enjoy the feeling of rain on your skin and learn to embrace this marvel of nature. Just make sure your backpack is waterproof—your laptop won't have the same appreciation for nature.

Choose Modes of Transportation Wisely

This point varies depending on where you live and whether you’re used to driving, walking, taking the train or buses, etc. Here are some general tips to keep in mind:

• Safety is better than movement. If you don’t feel secure on a given mode of transportation, then it’s probably best not to use it. Look for an alternative or stay put.
• Stairs are still your enemy (i.e., avoid the subway). Try to find alternatives, such as buses or cabs. Yes, taxis are expensive—make a cost-benefit analysis of getting somewhere, and choose accordingly.
• Use the driver’s door. If using buses, always exit and enter through the driver's door. If the driver doesn’t see your crutches, she or he might start the bus before you’re seated, causing a tumble.
• Ask for help. Commuting with someone always helps, whether in a carpool or just for assistance while getting in and out of vehicles.

Keep Exercising

I would strongly encourage you to go to physical therapy as early as you can. A trained professional can introduce you to exercises that will allow you to preserve your strength and promote speedier healing. One of my favorite exercise machines is the arm bike. It’s not as exciting as running or biking, but you can certainly break a sweat. Just make sure to get some guidance on how strenuous your workout should be.

The Bottom Line

The most important thing to remember during this period is that your life is not over. The limitations imposed by crutches are annoying, to be sure, but you’ll be surprised by how fast you can adapt to them. Being restricted in your activities also presents an opportunity to revisit your schedule and regular routines and prioritize what’s really important.

This guest post was written by Sid Efromovich, Greatist's Happiness Coach, speaker, teacher, and sugar trader. Follow Sid on Twitter.

Originally published August 2013. Updated January 2017.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jgsDr9

CABG and Open Heart Surgery in India

India has emerged as a major healthcare destination. Having invested millions of USD in infrastructure, medical equipment, medical schools and colleges today Indian healthcare benefits from thousands of trained healthcare professionals who graduate every year from premier medical colleges and are trained at some of the best healthcare facilities in India and abroad. Some of the best heart doctors or best cardiologists in India are able to take care of open heart surgeries, cabg, pediatric cardiology, interventional cardiology such as angiography, stenting or angioloasty.

from Health and Fitness Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2iT55b3

Cardio Vs Weight Lifting For Fat Burning

When it comes to burning fat everyone wants to know one thing, what is the best way to do it? Losing that extra stubborn body fat will help in one of two ways, to either turn your lifestyle around or to prepare your body for the beach this summer. However, besides just to look good, losing that stubborn body fat also has heart health benefits such as preventing heart disease!

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2kaB7Ei

Healthy Weight Loss Tips - 7 Tips For Safe & Long Term Weight Loss

Tip #1 Avoid Dieting - Stay away from short-term rapid weight loss diets. For the most part, the diet will make you cut your food so much that it wouldn't even be able to feed a ten-year-old for a day. Low-calorie diet plan plans develop a chain of physiological occasions that activates you to lose muscle, water, and fat...

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jgddTW

Here's Proof That Photos on Instagram Aren't Always What They Seem to Be

Deep down, we know most of the images we see on Instagram are at least a little staged—the lighting, the angles, the filters. But we still could use a reminder every now and then. That’s why we love fitness blogger Sara Puhto’s recent side-by-side post so much—it shows how a little flexing and posing (not to mention editing) can totally change the way you look.

Here’s what we’re talking about:

It’s tempting to compare our body (stomach rolls and all) to the ones we see in our feed, but that doesn’t mean we should. And we love that Puhto and many others keep reminding us of that.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jwUFzE

7 Party Foods That Make Sports Bar Grub Look Super Weak

7 Ways to Motivate Yourself to Work Out at Home When You *Really* Don’t Want To

If getting to the gym is half the battle, it should be easier to just eliminate that half and work out in the comfort of your own home, right?

Well, sort of. Although your place is crazy convenient, it's hard to stay motivated when you're so close to temptation (read: the TV and the couch).

To help you resist said temptation and get in a solid sweat session at home, we went straight to the people who know what it's like: our readers—real people with real lives, real jobs, and really busy schedules just like you. Here they share seven legit tips that'll motivate you to work out at home, even if you don't feel like it.

1. Find your digital fitness fit.

The No. 1 most important thing you can do is find a routine you're actually going to enjoy doing at home. Certain workouts (think equipment-heavy activities) won't translate well. But the good news: It's 2017, and thanks to technology, you have access to an endless amount of at-home exercise options.

Take a moment, think about what types of activities you enjoy, and then do some research. From fitness apps and websites (like this one, ahem) that transform your phone into a personal trainer to live stream videos that turn your living room into a fitness studio, there are plenty of ways to get guidance, motivation, and variety. With a little bit of internet research and soul-searching, you can easily find a fitness routine that will work for you.

"The key for me was finding something I loved doing," says Megan Wakefield of Littleton, CO. "I don't battle myself to do it because I want to do it, and I fully enjoy the process."

Partner

Get 30 Days of Free Workouts
Need added motivation this winter? Aaptiv is a new app that offers audio-only workouts from top trainers set to music you love. Classes range from strength training and HIIT workouts to yoga and running, so you'll always find something you love.
Available at aaptiv.com. Greatist readers get a free 30-day trial using code GREATIST!

2. Pencil it in.

Would you remember to go to your dentist appointment or make it to that weekly meeting if you didn't add it to your calendar? Probably not. The same goes for your workouts. "I schedule it like it's an appointment," says Holly Van Hare of Boston, MA. Prioritize exercise by blocking out time on your calendar and then planning your days and weeks around those blocks.

3. Set your space.

The tricky part about an at-home workout is that—surprise!—your home is not a gym. If you happen to have a gym in your home, lucky you. (Can we come over?) If you're a mere commoner like us, then you'll need to make whatever space you have work. That might mean setting up a mini gym in your basement or simply moving the coffee table over three inches to fit a yoga mat. Whatever you have to move/set up/dismantle, do it well before your scheduled workout (say, the night prior if you plan on getting up and working out), so there are no barriers or excuses. "I make a space for myself that feels like my own personal studio," Van Hare says.

4. Dress for success.

Now more than ever, it's acceptable to wear spandex just about anywhere. Take advantage of the trend and throw on gym clothes as soon as possible, at every given opportunity. Why? Well, one study suggests that simply wearing workout gear can help motivate you to exercise.

"On workdays I come home and change into my workout clothes before anything else, and on weekends I put them on first thing in the morning," says Antoinette Schoenthaler of New York City. "That way I have no excuses later."

5. Go public with it.

Hold the phone—literally. Before you tweet, message, or 'gram your workout plans, read this: You'll have a better chance of actually working out if you keep them to yourself. One study suggests that social recognition makes us less likely to follow through with our intentions.

But after you've crushed your workout, feel free to shout it from the social rooftops. Take a photo #fromwhereyoustand or snap a sweaty selfie. "I find I work harder for that extra satisfaction of sharing my achievement afterwards," Van Hare says. When you share your progress and accomplishments, you'll build a small group of cheerleaders, and you can tap into that satisfied feeling the next time you're on the fence about working out.

6. Use a carrot.

For real, though. It's okay to use small rewards to persuade yourself to work out. Do we hope you're compensating yourself with something as healthy as carrots? Sure. But if it's sometimes pizza, turkey chili, or a salted caramel brownie, that's okay too, because, balance.

"I usually work out right after work, so I hold off on eating dinner until after I’ve knocked out a workout," says Gassaway. "Mentally, it’s a big reward."

If food's not your thing, treat yourself to a new pair of sneakers if you complete all your workouts for a month.

7. Try a halfsie.

When working out at home sounds like the worst thing ever, barter with yourself. "I say I'll do half of what I normally do," Gassaway says. "Then, eight times out of 10, I do the full workout anyway because all I really needed was to get started." And the two times you don't finish? Well, at least you did half, and that's better than nothing.

The Bottom Line

The best way to motivate yourself to work out at home is to find a routine you truly enjoy, so your at-home workout doesn't feel like work. Then, control as many factors as you can to set yourself up for success and make it a habit. Sure, the couch looks damn good when you come home after a long day, but sinking into it will feel so much better after you've earned it.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2iJoLTb

You Should Never Get Back With an Ex, Unless…

I've seen friends get into relationships that are reminiscent of yo-yo dieting: The couple gets together, they break up, they get together, they break up, start, fail, start, fail. Every time, some small component of their lives haschanged, convincing them that things could be different this time around. But for the most part, these people are still who they were—he'd still rather stay home than go out; she still hates texting him back throughout the day—and it never works out.

This is why I always advise friends to never get back with an ex, despite the fact that every flawed relationship looks so rosy in hindsight, scrubbed of its passive-aggressive arguments and last-minute cancellations. Biology is actually trying to be kind when our brains wipe out unpleasant memories, but that’s a double-edged sword. In this magical hindsight filter, an ex who didn't treat you very well can look pretty awesome.

I’ve had the relationship that started, stopped, and started again—only to stop for good, with some fireworks for good measure. I’ve also had relationships that simply started and ended in tears. So after all I’ve learned, and all the advice I've told my friends, even I was surprised when I got together with my current boyfriend...

Yeah, he’s my ex.

But not every relationship that fizzled initially is doomed to fail a second time. Here’s why this time feels different.

1. The first time around, we were really young...

In the U.S., adulthood may technically start at 18, but our maturity level at that age leaves something to be desired, to say the least. When my boyfriend and I first started dating, we were the ripe old age of 20—not even able to buy a bottle of wine for date night. Our careers were still in the dreaming-planning stage, our parents still financially supported us, and we lived in the bubble that is student housing. We were two people still figuring out how to start our lives, planning our escapes into "the real world." But anticipating the future and actually living it are very different things.

For a relationship to deserve a second chance, the couple shouldn't still be in the same situation they were in the first time around, hoping against hope that some magical thing will be different. But time, distance, and the opportunity to grow can create that necessary change. These days, we're grown-ups who know more about what we want and need from life, so our relationship is able to be more mature as well.

No longer long distance!

2. ...and we were trying to make it work long-distance.

This is a rule I still tell people not to break, because it’s been such a monumental struggle whenever I've broken it. The truth is, dating long-distance hurts. Waiting all day until a video chat, communicating primarily by text, never getting to hold hands or attend events together… none of this is fun. So when my boyfriend and I started dating shortly before we went off to different schools, we braced ourselves for the distance. We did what we could to make it work, and alternated weekends visiting each other. But not only did this adversely affect my relationship with my friends ("Sorry, I can't make it, again…"), it was exhausting. I always felt like I was missing out on both my relationship and my social life.

You might also like READ

So when we got back in touch—years later, with 3,000 miles between us—I knew that this relationship wouldn't work if it were still long-distance. When we were ready, we made the big, game-changing decision to move to the same city. It finally felt like a real shot at being together.

3. When we broke up, we didn't go down in flames.

When we finally decided that the distance was much to bear, we ended things. I’m not going to say the relationship would’ve lasted forever if we hadn't been long-distance, but this external circumstance was definitely the reason we ended things when we did. That meant that when we reignited our relationship, we didn't have any screaming, ugly fights or hair-pulling frustrations coming back to mind. It finally felt like we were meeting in the right time and the right place.

4. We'd never really left our comfort zones.

I think that everybody should move somewhere new and far from home at least once in their life. Whether you grew up in a tiny town or a giant metropolis, there’s an incredible experience to be had by trying something new, and you can learn a lot about yourself that way. The first time my boyfriend and I got together, we were both Californians through and through; we both grew up in a suburb of Los Angeles and traveled only as far as the Bay Area for college. We'd spent pretty much our entire lives within the same state lines. After we broke up, I studied abroad and later moved to the East Coast. He spent months hiking across the country, coming home only to save up for the next great adventure. In that time, we also expanded our occupational boundaries, completely changing our careers. Getting out of our comfort zones undoubtedly helped us grow into our own selves independently, so when we met back up, we each had a greater sense of our individual identities.

Back in the day

5. I’m not thinking about "last time."

I always let people know that we dated before, since I’m bound to tell a story or mention a time from that early year together. But normally, I’m not thinking about it. We don’t say, "I’m so glad we got back together." We just say, "I’m so happy we’re together." Because history or not, the people we are today make this relationship happen. We didn’t even talk for several years after breaking up, so although we have a long history together, we also have long periods of life that don’t involve each other. This gives us a familiar past to share, but the focus is on now… and the now is looking pretty good—especially since we’re not taking selfies with bulky cameras anymore.

Christie is a Seattle-based freelance writer with a deep interest in why we are the way we are, and how we can be a little bit better. She's an LA native, Stanford graduate, relentless vegetarian, and coffee enthusiast. Follow her on Twitter @ChristieBrydon and Instagram @woweezow33.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jGYRzb

7 Desk Stretches to Ease a Tight Neck, Shoulders, and Wrists From Sitting All Day

Our bodies were made to move, which is why sitting for a good portion of your day—at a desk, behind the wheel, or plopped in front of the televison—is no bueno, no matter how active you are. With time, you'll start feeling tightness in your shoulders, neck, wrists, and lower back. But here's the good news: Taking a quick break to walk around the office or do some simple stretches like the ones in this 6-minute video can keep tightness at bay and keep you moving throughout the day.

You might also like READ

This yoga-inspired series features 7 stretches that will help alleviate tightness in your neck, shoulders, and wrists, and relieve the strain in your eyes from staring at a screen all day. You don't even have to get up from your desk to do them. Whether you rarely work out or exercise every day, you'll reap the benefits of these time-efficient stretches. All you need is a sturdy, comfortable chair to get started. Then hit play.

Looking for more short and effective at-home workouts? Grokker has thousands of routines, so you’ll never get bored. Bonus: For a limited time, Greatist readers get 40 percent off Grokker Premium (just $9 per month) and their first 14 days free. Sign up now!

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2k8cNz2

How Becoming Die-Hard Paleo Backfired on My Body

Not my favorite place to be, but still smiling.

I fell for the natural living movement hook, line, and sinker. In the span of a few weeks, I ditched all my harsh chemical cleaners and toiletries, I started reading every label in the grocery store to make sure I avoided food additives and dyes, and I started learning how to can my own tomatoes for sauce. But all of my dedication to natural living didn't transform me into a picture of health—in fact, it landed me in the hospital.

It's not surprising that I was drawn in by the natural living movement's promises of better health and wellness. A few years ago, I was diagnosed with mitochondrial disease, a progressive genetic disease with no treatment or cure. Doctors focused on treating my symptoms, but they acknowledged there was nothing they could do to stop me from getting sicker. My future suddenly felt limited in a way I'd never imagined.

In my desperate search for a treatment, I stumbled across the Paleo diet. I read Paleo blog after Paleo blog, and all of them assured me that anything could be cured by the right combination of food, supplements, and natural living. Food could be my medicine, they said, and with no other hope, I threw myself into transforming my lifestyle. I ditched processed foods and carbs, bought an essential oil diffuser, and started doing yoga. I was so enthusiastic about my lifestyle change that I even began my own Paleo blog to chronicle my journey to good health.

You might also like READ

At first, it seemed like everything I'd read was true. Following a Paleo diet helped me lose weight almost immediately; it also cured my constant acid reflux and improved my migraines. I looked and felt better, and I couldn't stop singing its praises. Flush with my success, I went to my doctors and asked them whether I really needed all of the medications they had me on. They only offered symptom relief, and I was convinced that through time the healthy food I was eating would make everything better. With my doctors' blessing, I ditched all of my medications and focused on my new natural lifestyle.

It took me a long time to notice that I was weaker and had less energy while eating Paleo, and even longer to admit it to myself. When I mentioned it to other people following the diet, they told me that I just needed to go even more hardcore Paleo and remove even more foods from my diet. I gave up everything from eggs to nuts to tomatoes, but my energy levels didn't improve. After about six months, things got so bad that my doctors ordered infusions at the hospital. I lay in a chair twice a week hooked up to an IV just to have enough energy to go to the grocery store. I was preparing all my meals from scratch, spending an hour or more in the kitchen each day, and I had no energy left for anything else. My life became small and limited.

I lost a lot of weight eating Paleo. I dropped three pants sizes, and people often told me how great I looked. But I was pale, even for me, and I always had deep, black circles under my eyes. I didn't look like any of the Paleo bloggers on Instagram who wrote about their own health transformations, and as time went on, I looked worse, not better. Nothing about me felt healthy, and every day it seemed like my pain levels increased. My feet felt like they were being electrocuted, and my muscles ached so deeply that it felt like the pain was in my bones. No matter what I did, the pain was there, but I still didn't quit. If natural living couldn't cure me, what other options did I have?

I didn't give up on the promises of natural living easily. I kept eating Paleo, relying on essential oils and mindfulness for pain relief, until my IV infusions took their toll; after a few months, all of my veins were scarred and blown. The nurses started talking about a central line… which came with the risk of infections that could kill me. And that's when I called it quits.

I'd embraced a natural lifestyle for health reasons, and I ditched it for health reasons too. I decided to see what medication and a steady dose of carbs throughout the day could do for me before I seriously considered a central line. I stopped spending hours on food shopping and preparation, and I even gave up worrying about every little ingredient in my food. I went back to premade sauces and simple meals, and I put my canning pot in the garage. I ate high-fructose corn syrup sometimes, and I stopped sweating every GMO in my tortillas.

I'd embraced a natural lifestyle for health reasons, and I ditched it for health reasons too.

There's something to be said for choosing mostly whole foods. I still don't eat most grains or dairy because they upset my stomach and give me migraines. I diffuse essential oils when my kids have a cold or cough, and I drop garlic oil in their ears when they get ear infections. Some aspects of natural living have been helpful for me, but it's not a cure for everything, and that line of thinking is where I went wrong initially.

Eating too much of the wrong foods can cause health problems, but that doesn't mean the opposite is true. There's no such thing as a food cure, and not everyone can be healthy. My genes can't be changed by cold-pressed juice and coconut oil, but my desperation made me an easy target for natural-living enthusiasts looking to sell books, supplements, and oils.

My story doesn't have a happy ending, because that's not how genetic diseases work. I won't be cured by medicine or food, but I'm no longer in pain all day, because the prescription medications I take (the ones developed by Big Pharma) relieve my pain. I am happier and more independent because I'm in less pain, and I have more time now to focus on the things I love instead of wasting my energy in the kitchen. Ditching the natural living movement got me off the infusions and gave me my life back.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2iS6vlU

7 Easy Veggie Chili Recipes That Prove You Don't Need Meat to Make It Hearty

'Stuff No One Explains About Motherhood' List Finally Tells the Truth

Becoming a mother is, among other things, a shock to the system. You've got to deal with all sorts of physical, mental, and emotional changes. And the truth is, no matter how deep you dig into books, blog posts, and even the minds of your new-mom friends, tons of things will catch you by surprise.

So it makes sense that when mommy blogger Gylisa Jayne shared a list of all the things she learned as a new mom, the post went viral. It's incredibly relatable—almost painfully so.

Jayne covers it all, from how much breast-feeding hurts the first few weeks to the fact that everyone (like, EVERYONE) has an opinion on how you should raise your kid. And conveniently, no one tells you how to get all those people to back off.

The list is as funny as it is honest and relatable. Jayne just gets it:

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2iGCme1

Is Treatment For A Cold And The Flu The Same?

Although the cold and flu have almost similar symptoms, the fact is they are two totally different conditions caused by two distinctly different viruses. As such the treatments too differ.

from Health and Fitness Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jQOYfP

What Happens During A SmartLipo Procedure?

SmartLipo is essentially a kind of advanced liposuction procedure. It is used to eliminate stubborn pockets of fat especially around the abdomen, thighs, upper arms and neck. The treatment is quick and painless and is usually carried out as an outpatient basis.

from Health and Fitness:Beauty Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jd5QfM

Straighten Your Hair Easily And Inexpensively

If you have naturally curly hair, it can be time-consuming to get it straight. Salons charge quite a bit for the blowout procedure. Many of the straightening products can damage your hair or they take a long time to work. Who has hours to spend to get straight hair? You don't have to let the curls have their way though.

from Health and Fitness:Beauty Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2iOCtzG

7 Tips to Burning Fat During Breakfast

Do you know which the most important meal of the day is? Yes, you guessed it, its breakfast! Here is an interesting fact; those who eat breakfast on a regular basis tend to have more energy throughout the day and have better concentration. And because they have better concentration and energy they get more done during the day!

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jQ4yYY

7 Quick Weight Loss Tips To Speed Up Metabolism

If you need to lose weight, these weight loss tips might help you lose those extra pounds. These seven quick weight loss tips will likewise assist you in, if you are currently in outstanding physical condition, to form your body to an even higher degree. Any weight reduction tips to help accelerate metabolism do just that...

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2iWWsPP

4 Mental Keys to Burning Fat

Do you know what the best way start losing weight is? It is to start losing it in your head. And I'm not trying to say you have a fat head either! What I am referring to is your mental referencing towards losing weight.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jQ4okv

This 15-Year-Old Proves There Isn't Just One Body Type for Ballerinas

When we picture a ballerina, we think of someone who's tiny. No, tinier than that. Waifish, even. But ballet is about pulling off stunning arabesques and pirouettes, not the size of your thighs or the legnth of your arms. And 15-year-old Lizzy Howell is here to prove it. Her Instagram is full of photos and videos of her killing it in ballet class, showing that you can be a talented and graceful ballerina at any size.

Everything Howell shares is inspiring, but this video of her practicing her impressive fouetté turns is getting a lot of attention:

Honestly, though, we love it all.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jCbmMq

Simplified Factsheet About Drinking Alkaline Water

Heard a lot of buzz about alkaline water? Read on to find some of the important details that need attention, especially with regards to initiating the alkaline way of living!

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2k7m0vi

Neurology Surgery - What Are the Specialized Branches and Modern Surgical Methods?

Neurology is a medical specialty that is associated with the diagnosis, surgical treatment and rehabilitation of the disorders which affect the nervous system. The nervous system includes brain, spinal cord, and peripheral nervous system and extra-cranial cerebro-vascular system.

from Health and Fitness Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2iWDR6w

Workout and Weight Loss Work Together - Some Beneficial Tips

It is a reality that workout and weight loss go hand in hand. It's likewise not practical to simply work out and not consume healthy as though you might be overweight, your body requires nutrition to securely and efficiently lose weight. Yoga assists Yoga.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jBY7M1

Stress Blocks Weight Loss - Get These Stress-Busting Tips

Stress in making us SICK, FAT, AND SAD. Don't let this unhealthy way of life continue another day! Use these 3 simple tips to help cut the stress in your life and promote weight loss.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jrV0n1

9 Upgraded Buddha Bowls That Are So 2017

9 Healthier Waffles That Will Put 'Em Back on Your Meal-Planning Radar

Peer Pressure Can Make You Healthier… Here's How

The author, Alexis, and her dog, Giant.

It's easy to set healthy goals, but actually achieving them is much, much harder. Whether you're trying to make progress on your physical fitness or maintain your emotional well-being, it can be incredibly tempting to cheat… especially if you're the only person who knows what you're trying to do. I've definitely had some ambitions I let slide before, so a while ago, my therapist introduced me to my new favorite way to stay on track: having an "accountability partner"—someone who I can trust to keep me moving on a healthy path and who will call me out if I start to waver.

At the time, I was struggling with body dysmorphia, and my therapist encouraged me to remove all the full-length mirrors from my house. But to ensure I wouldn’t cheat, she made me turn over my mirrors to someone who could be my accountability partner. I chose my mother, who hid all my full-length mirrors for me, so I could no longer scrutinize my thighs every night before bed. Before I knew it, I'd forgotten to even want a full-length mirror, and over time, my body dysmorphia went from overwhelming to essentially irrelevant in my daily life.

Making those positive changes toward a more healthy body image would have been much harder—maybe even impossible—without someone else making sure I didn’t cheat. I know myself; without an accountability partner, I probably would have pretended to follow my therapist’s directions… and then kept on doing what I was doing, making no improvement whatsoever. But because I had someone I care for right there to keep me accountable, I made progress in an important aspect of my health.

You might also like READ

Having an accountability partner can be great for your emotional or mental wellness, but it's also a great strategy for achieving fitness and diet goals. When you're trying to make significant changes in your daily routine, going it alone is hard. Having trustworthy people in your corner will make sure that you stick to the goals and resolutions you’ve made for yourself.

Be specific when setting your goals (and let your accountability partner know all about them).

I use the SMART method of goal-setting, an acronym that stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Time-Bound. Specificity is crucial to achieving goals; without it, it’s easy to fall victim to aimlessness. Saying "I’m going to lose weight," is too vague—it's much more effective to say "I am going to lose 11 pounds in three months by combining a healthy diet and Pilates classes." That way, your weight loss goal is specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and yes, time-bound. And when you share your super-specific goal with your accountability partner, they'll know more precisely how to help you should you start falling off-track.

Demand answerability.

If you’re going to have accountability partners, they need to follow through. Checking in once in awhile isn’t good enough; a good accountability partner will check in regularly with friendly questions and statements to ensure you’re making progress. When I was training for my first half-marathon, I had a friend who was an avid runner push me to reach my goals. If I skipped a long run one day, she’d refuse to hang out with me until I took care of business. It sounds silly, but it worked! I didn’t want to let myself down... and I definitely didn’t want my karaoke partner-in-crime to go MIA on me for slacking.

"How many times have you been to the gym this week?" is a perfect way for an accountability partner to check in for a fitness goal. “What has your diet been like this week?” “Find any good Whole 30 recipes?” “How are you keeping up with your 8-week fitness plan?” A great accountability partner will know what to ask and will not let you slack—even when you want to. The only trick is, you have to pick someone who you really want to be honest with.

Peer pressure works.

No, not all peer pressure is bad peer pressure. Having a partner who is down for participating right alongside you while you achieve your goals is the best accountability partner there is! But if your partner of choice isn’t able to jump right into your brand new workout regimen, that’s OK. As long as you have someone cheering you on, you’re well on your way to achieving your goal.

Alexis Dent is a writer and cupcake aficionado from Western New York. Follow her on Twitter @alexisdent.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jrygDE

These Stunning Looks Show What Anxiety and Depression Feel Like

By nature, most of our battles with anxiety and depression happen in our heads—and it’s really, really tempting to keep them hidden there. But beauty blogger Yasaman Ghedi wants to make those mental health struggles visible. That's why she started the #InsideOutChallenge on Instagram, which encourages people to use makeup to give a face (literally) to those struggles.

Yasaman’s formula is simple: Apply your everyday makeup to half of your face, and then depict what living with mental illness feels like on other half. Here's Ghedi's finished product:

The results are, of course, as haunting as they are beautiful. (Check out examples of other people's take on the #InsideOutChallenge below.) Most importantly, though, they’re a reminder that the stigma and secrecy that so often surround mental illness are both major issues we need to fight.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jzSWLY

Change Your Life With the Fat Diminisher System

The Fat Diminisher System is a detailed four-week guide to help you achieve weight loss and ultimate health. It was developed by professional fitness trainer Wes Virgin and based on the studies and formulas of Severino, a Harvard student from Thailand. This unique guide includes dietary recommendations, herbal and mineral supplements, effective exercise programs, and suggestions for relaxation and mental health.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jL4jhK

The Fat Dminisher System Review

It is time to change your weight in your new year. This is best review of what is nature way to lose your weight by following steps of Guide of The Fat diminisher program. It is time to read honest review what I collected some information. Read here for more details.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2iRnJTX

How to Get Creativity for Nail Art Design

Nail design is another part of workmanship and craftsmanship needs motivation. Different sorts of nails expressions are making each day by nail artists yet in the event that you know how to do the best nail design at home then you additionally require the motivation to make new nail expressions on your nail bed.

from Health and Fitness:Beauty Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jZw2L3

Gel Nail or Acrylic Nail, What You Should Select

In this modern trend of nail design gel nail and acrylic nail powder is getting more and more importance every day. But it is really hard to understand that which one is good for you and which one is not. Here is the detail about them.

from Health and Fitness:Beauty Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jwpkzE

7 Pieces of Relationship Advice That Go Against Everything You Assume

When a couple comes to see me for relationship counseling, most of the time it's for help with communication, either in general or surrounding a specific event. Asking for help with communication within your relationship doesn't mean it's doomed to fail; it means you're a normal human couple. Of course, my partner and I are both mental health therapists, so we communicate perfectly 100 percent of the time... just kidding. We have our own issues, like every other couple.

In working with couples and in my own relationship, I've found that a lot of relationship advice tends to be ineffective and unrealistic. Since we're all imperfect humans, we're going to make mistakes, require time to cool down, and need to ask questions of ourselves and our partners in order to grow together. I've rounded up some of my favorite communication pointers that can genuinely help you out the next time you find yourself in a misunderstanding with your partner.

1. Go ahead and go to bed angry.

Chances are, you've heard someone say "never go to bed angry" when talking about fighting within a relationship. I'm here to tell you that you should absolutely go to bed angry. Arguments at the end of the day are often exacerbated by built-up irritations or small miscommunications. Rather than trying to communicate when you are tired and spent, get a good night's sleep and tackle it together in the morning. Many times, with a little rest, you'll find the situation seems more manageable in the light of day.

2. It's good to let each other get away with stuff.

OK, we shouldn't encourage one another to become inconsiderate monsters, but we also need to remember that no one is perfect. For example, my partner leaves his shaving stuff on the bathroom sink, and I leave my shoes in the middle of the entryway. We're both absent-minded at times, and we're working on that, but it's not OK for me to fly into a rage at him over his razor, especially since he is kind to me despite tripping over my ballet flats on more than one occasion. A more content and loving partnership is built through gentle reminders and patient understanding, rather than passive-aggressive comments and constant criticism.

3. Don't hit that send button! Fighting over text is terrible...

Fighting over text message often leads to further miscommunication and misunderstanding. When we text, we can't fully interpret the messages we receive; the clues that normally help us decode our partner's true intent (like body language, voice tone, and eye contact) are absent in text messages. So as we attempt to understand these messages—not only the words, but the meaning behind them—our imaginations fill in these blanks. This is why text message disputes can blow out of proportion, leaving both parties baffled by how a small disagreement could end in a huge fight.

4. ...but writing out your thoughts before talking is pretty great.

When you take the time to write out your thoughts, especially your responses to topics that you know may get heated during communication, you're able to process difficult feelings before you discuss them. This gives you the opportunity to approach the subject at hand more calmly, rather than attacking your partner out of anger or hurt. By writing about your feelings, you may also be able to identify exactly what causes you to feel intense negative emotions and why. For example, if your ex used to compare you to other people, that might explain why you become upset when your partner praises another person's accomplishments. Being able to identify that issue and communicate it to your partner can increase trust and closeness.

5. Express your needs… even if you think you sound "needy."

When a client says to me, "Lauren, I need something, and my partner isn't doing it!" I ask, "Have you told your partner what you need?" The response is often a resounding no, followed by, "I don't want to seem needy," or "They should know what I want without asking."

Having needs does not make you needy; it makes you a human. And while I understand that directly asking your partner to, say, massage your shoulders after a long day may not be as romantic as them automatically knowing what to do, your partner isn't a mind reader. Ask direct questions and make clear requests so that your partner knows exactly what you want and need without the guessing games. There is something incredibly sexy about having your needs met by the person you love... even if you had to give them a little guidance.

6. Don't cook for your partner.

When I say "don't cook for your partner," I mean, "don't cook for them unless that's something that's important to them." Let's extend this food analogy: Say you take the day off work to spend a whole day making cookies for your partner. We're talking about that from-scratch, special-occasion kind of baking. Your partner gets home, the kitchen is a mess, and there's a smudge of flour across your face. "Look, honey!" you say. "I spent all day making cookies for you!"

Your partner looks puzzled and says, "Thanks, but... I really don't like cookies. I like pie." It's a nightmare scenario. You've exhausted your resources, but neither of you have your needs met. Instead, everyone gets a helping of hurt feelings and frustration. How could your partner not appreciate your cookies? How could you not know your partner prefers pie?

I'm here to tell you that you should absolutely go to bed angry.

This is why communicating is so important. A helpful model that I use on a regular basis is called The Five Love Languages, developed by Gary Chapman. The Five Love Languages are five ways to experience and communicate love to a partner, which are: Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, and Quality Time. There's a quiz you can take to discover your love language; most people have a primary and secondary love language.

My love language is Quality Time. I need someone to give me eye contact, to hang out with me without distractions, to go places with me, and to simply spend time together. In a previous relationship, I was with someone who communicated through Acts of Service. Instead of listening when I said I needed time together, he would bring up all the times he did the dishes or took my car to get the oil changed. True, he had made an effort and was helpful in that way, but it wasn't what I was asking for or what I needed. My needs weren't being met, he felt his efforts were unappreciated, and we were both frustrated.

You might also like READ

Maybe your partner would rather eat takeout than a home-cooked meal, but wants a cheesy Hallmark card. Maybe your partner can wash their own car but needs to spend four uninterrupted hours with you on a Saturday. Or maybe your partner would pass on a bouquet and would rather you go to the grocery store so they don't have to. Avoid spending time and energy on efforts that won't fulfill your partner, and instead communicate with one another about specific wants and needs so that the time and energy you do spend is productive and meaningful.

7. Disagree with each other.

So often, disagreements are seen as threats to the stability of the relationship—some couples will avoid a disagreement at all costs, even if it means stuffing their feelings down and being quietly unhappy. Rather than seeing disagreements negatively, issues can be seen as natural, normal, and part of any healthy relationship. Disagreements are an opportunity to communicate, understand, listen to your partner, and grow together. Disagreements can lead to healthier communication patterns and a stronger relationship overall.

One of my favorite communication tools to use in the midst of an argument is called the I-Message—no, not the blue bubbles on your phone screen. In this context, an I-Message is a type of communication that places the focus of the conversation on the feelings of the person speaking, rather than using accusations to communicate their discontent.

The standard formula for an I-Message is as follows: I feel [feeling word] when [talk about scenario that made you feel this way, then talk about the result you would prefer.] For example, "I feel overwhelmed and exhausted when I do the cooking and the cleaning. Is there any way we could work together to get it done?"

If you've been the one doing both the laundry and the cooking, and it's been frustrating you, this format might not be your first thought. You'd probably be more tempted to say, "You never do anything around here!" or even "It would be nice to get some help in the kitchen for once!" But framing the situation like this can make your partner feel attacked, leading them to become defensive. Formatting these feelings of frustration into an I-Message may feel counterintuitive at first, but it does increase the likelihood of a more positive response from your partner, and can help you both grow closer through stronger communication.

While a perfect relationship is impossible, a healthy, fulfilling relationship is something each of us can achieve with a supportive partner and the right communication tools. When two people work to fight fairly, express their needs, and foster understanding, the result is a strong and happy relationship built on trust and open communication.

Lauren Hasha is a writer and mental health counselor living in San Antonio, Texas. Visit her website or connect with her on Instagram and Twitter.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2iQjOXb

7 Homemade Tomato Sauce Recipes That Would Make Your Grandma Proud

I Spent 20 Years Following My Dream… but Quitting Made Me Happier

From the last batch of headshots I ever took, when I was clearly totally miserable and exhausted.

I spent almost two decades pursuing my dream of becoming a working actress. In my bleaker moments, such as driving home from an audition in which I had to dance like a chicken in a bikini, I imagined what it would be like if I quit. In my fantasy, walking away from acting felt monstrous and fittingly movie-moment climactic: a grand proclamation ("I AM GIVING UP ON MY LIFELONG DREAM"), a grief-filled packing of my car, a defeated retreat to my parents' basement in suburban Virginia. But like so many potential dramas, quitting acting was nothing but an almost imperceptible shift of gravity. It didn't happen in an instant. It was gradual: missing a class, the quiet tucking away of headshots, letting my IMDBpro membership lapse.

I think a lot about my 13-year-old self, full of that uniquely 13-year-old psychotic fervor. At that age, I'd proclaim to anyone who might seem like they were listening that I would never, ever give up on my dream of being an actress, that this was my destiny, that I was that one in a million! According to 13-year-old me, I would star in The X-Files, get married to Leonardo DiCaprio, and do Maybelline commercials ("Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's Maybelline… NOPE, SHE'S MARRIED TO LEONARDO DICAPRIO. SHE WAS TOTALLY BORN WITH IT.")

I did not get cast in the X-Files, however. / Illustration by the author, Mikayla Park.

Now I wish I could creep on my 13-year-old self, a la A Christmas Carol (Ghost of Christmas That's Totally Creepin' on You), and tell her that all those years equating her worth with her work would wear her down and strip her of everything she valued about herself. I would tell her that the time she spent worrying that she wasn't pretty enough or thin enough or appealing enough would come at a terrible cost to her sense of self-worth. I'd explain how uncomfortable she would be promoting herself, how dirty she would feel befriending people who might be able to help her get ahead.

I'd like to note here that I don't mean to denigrate my actor friends; it's bold and gutsy to believe in yourself enough to survive in that industry. I've just never had that particular brand of moxie, and that's totally OK too. I have other very nice qualities.

You might also like READ

For me, the grind of auditioning slowly suffocated my love of the art until it was gone, but I still pushed on, terrified to acknowledge the loss. My latent depression sensed the blood in the water and surfaced, feeding off every rejection, every perceived failure, turning me into someone my 13-year-old self would barely recognize, someone fearful and jealous and bitter and sad.

I still don't regret any of those very difficult years; they shaped me into a much wiser—and gentler—person. We are so many different people in a lifetime; we change so very much, things affect our lives in ways we can't anticipate, and it doesn't make any sense to maintain some sort of token loyalty to a dream to which we pledged ourselves a million selves ago.

And it is. / Illustration by the author, Mikayla Park.

Being an actress was never my identity; being an actress isn't an identity at all. But it was only when I stopped defining myself that way that I rediscovered all of the things that I actually am: loyal and funny and strange, and surprisingly resilient.

If I were to go back to that 13-year-old, I'd encourage her to be kind, because I wasn't very understanding at 13, and the decision to give up acting didn't come without a cost. I watch the people from my former life in movies and on TV, living the dream I wanted so long for myself. I wonder how long it might have taken, if I would have gotten there myself had I just pushed on for a little longer. I once heard that when a great love is over, it takes half the length of the affair to truly heal from it. But I'm not worried, because I've also learned to be patient.

Best. Makeup. Ad. Ever. / Illustration by the author, Mikayla Park.

I know I've been acting like I really wish I could tell my former self all of these things, but I'm pretty grateful I don't have to because, as I said, I wasn't super understanding back then, and I don't know that as a teenager I would have truly understood exactly why being a grown woman dancing like a chicken in a bikini is so disheartening. I would probably just give her a big hug and tell her everything is going to be just fine, because that's really what you need to hear when you're 13. I know that because now that's what I tell my dreamer students at a job that I love that pays for an apartment all my very own.

It's been difficult for me to come to terms with the fact that I have fallen out of love with my dream, and I think that, if maybe I had read something honest and (hopefully a little) comforting, maybe it would have made it easier to face. So if you're facing, or trying not to face, something similar, I hope you can pat yourself on the back, and give your poor little heart a huge break. I hope you can remind yourself that we should all feel incredibly grateful that we are not held accountable to every dream we had when we were kids. But some dreams, of course, are timeless (Leo, I'm looking at you.)

Mikayla Park is a teacher/nonprofit creative person residing in the slums of Beverly Hills. Find her, and her two charming rescue dogs, everywhere at @mikaylapark.

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jJWGYT

35 Bean Recipes for All Your Plant-Protein (and High-Fiber) Needs

Lose Belly Fat Smarter

For many years people have been searching hard on the solution of losing belly fat effectively. There are too many theories, knowledge, and advice from many people on the internet. And all these information have been very overwhelming, and sometimes can be confusing.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jVVHnB

Lose Weight Fast At Home With Your Body

For people who don't have the time or effort to go to the gym, home is their only solution to fulfill their weight loss goal. However, many people have this misconception that home will not help you to lose weight. And it is absolutely not true! This article will show you how that you can lose weight fast at home with your body only.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2k1SreM

9 Nacho Recipes to Make Game Day (Just a Tad) Healthier

Guggul - For Natural and Effective Weight Loss

The modern world is an open source which provides us with a lot of comfort and leisure. Although these current advancements have made our lives easier, the sedentary lifestyle has made us prone to a lot of diseases, the most common being obesity.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jssN27

The Weight Loss Resolution Wobble

How's your weight loss resolution going this year? Have you reached the point where your resolve wobbles?

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2j4zEv0

Control Your Weight and Insulin With Antioxidants

In the 1950's Denham Harman proved the free radical theory of aging is right and over the years it has also been found that free radicals are a foundation of a number of diseases like atherosclerosis and cancer. They causes inflammation in the body and degeneration and disease follows. Obesity is one result. Inflammation is also involved in Crohn's disease, ulcerative colitis and Alzheimer's as well as many other diseases.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2jk1G6V

How to Use an Electric Bike for Weight Loss

It seems that with the rise of a progressive and industrialized nation, is a more sedentary life of its citizens. What with all the gadgets, machines, instruments, tools and equipment that science and technology has brought to mankind making their work easier.

from Health and Fitness:Weight Loss Articles from EzineArticles.com http://ift.tt/2k0BzFj

7 Ways to Be Calmer, More Mature… and More Productive

I was recently in a business meeting with two men who disagreed on a plan of action. Is this uncommon in the workplace? Nope. Can it be uncomfortable? Um, definitely… especially when egos get involved.

Everyone else in the room braced themselves while the two executives faced off with their wildly different opinions. But to our surprise, the meeting went remarkably well… and all because one of these men simply exuded a calm maturity that was impossible to fight against. He met his colleague's argumentative tone with absolute tranquility, and the situation diffused.

Instead of offering rebuttals and contradictions, he kept saying things like, "I absolutely see your point, Jeff," and "You're right about that. Could we consider…"

I was impressed. Egos didn't rule that morning; they couldn't. There was too much calm in the room.

And you just can't meet that kind of Zen-like state with fire.

So what are more ways to bring tranquility, maturity, and inner peace into our lives? What we focus on has a tendency to expand. So if you focus on the drama, that's what you get, but if you focus on serenity, well… who couldn't use a little more of that this year? Here are seven ways you can bring more of that cool, collected calm—and the successes that results from it—into your life.

1. Focus on your own sh*t.

It can be so easy to compare ourselves to other people over our paychecks, the contents of our closets, relationship statuses... but when you realize that all that matters (and all that you can control) is you, you can't help but just do you. And when that happens, life gets awesome.

2. Don't overthink stuff.

When you stop trying to dissect and interpret the words, texts, tweets, and motivations of others, you'll experience that dose of tranquility you need. "Analysis paralysis" is such a precious waste of your time.

3. Know how to laugh at yourself.

Joan Rivers said, "Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It's all funny." Life doesn't have to be so serious, does it? And once you get to the point where you can laugh at yourself, you can laugh at pretty much anything.

You might also like READ

4. Work before you play.

Maturity can almost always be measured by delayed gratification. Do the work first, don't half-ass it, care... and then play. Work can be fun too—especially when you commit to doing work that you love. Adulting can be great adventure, if you give it a chance.

5. Don't gossip.

When you just walk away from the water cooler when the boss is being whispered about, you're really doing yourself a favor in the long run.

6. Don't blame others.

I don't think there is anything more grown-up than taking 100 percent responsibility for your life. No excuses or exceptions—parental, governmental, or otherwise. When you own your circumstances and your "stuff," you're empowered.

7. Don't react.

There's nothing like watching reality TV to observe some highly reactive, immature, theatrical overreactions… and onscreen, they're great. Bring the drama!

But when you become a reality TV star's polar opposite—when you've mastered the art of non-reaction and let something that could have offended you just slide—then you're really winning.

Maturity begins when drama and dissatisfaction ends. We can quantify our calm by our ability to, in the words of T-Swift, "shake it off." You really can choose to free yourself from anything: a rude remark, an under-the-breath diss from someone you've never liked, an online hater, a passive-aggressive colleague... whatever.

When you can shake all that off and just focus on the present moment—which is all we ever have—you kinda have it all figured out. Guilt and regret can have you living the past, and anxiety and worry can make you future-trip. When you can simply Be Here Now… well, that calm will carry you far.

Susie Moore is Greatist's life coach columnist and a confidence coach in New York City. Her new book, What If It Does Work Out?, is available on Amazon now. Sign up for free weekly wellness tips on her website and check back every Tuesday for her latest No Regrets column!

from Greatist RSS http://ift.tt/2jvbn4l